Search Results for: newt gingrich
Gingrich Charged With Felonious Photoshopping
WASHINGTON DC –GlossyNews Newt Gingrich, politician and part-time front runner in the GOPTea™ presidential race, has been charged with “the gravest, most evil transgression that humanity has ever been subjected to.” An activist group claims Mr. Gingrich has been illegally…
Fidel Polled Better Than Newt in Miami
MIAMI, FL —GlossyNews In a revealing, some even said shocking, poll taken after the Jacksonville GOPTea™ debate in Florida, Fidel Castro came in 4% ahead of Newt Gingrich, one of the real candidates for the presidential primary contest. The poll…
Aging Gingrich Sucking Life Out of Youthful Santorum Race
Volunteers for GOP candidate Rick Santorum say they are growing more tired by the day trying to come up with good things to say about Newt Gingrich in order to keep the Gingrich/Santorum tag team going against candidate Mitt Romney….
Newt Reveals ‘Cart Before Horse’ Campaign
DES MOINES, IA —GlossyNews GOPTea Presidential candidate Newt Gingrich proposes to mount a nationwide nomination strategy without the use of a strong professional campaign staff. He says all he has is Callista. Gingrich freely admits it is a dizzy idea….
RUSH LIMBAUGH BLUNDER! “Drinking Toilet Water a Step Up For Migrants… & it Tastes Great!
Palm Beach, FL- Conservative firebrand and longtime hate addict, Rush Limbaugh, managed to get the attention of non-right wing extremists on Tuesday, when he made a series of potentially racist comments regarding a congress woman, and detainees housed at a…
Glossy News Exclusive: Sean Hannity’s Secret… That Everybody Already Knows
Washington, DC- For most Americans, Sean Hannity is known as a fiery conservative mouth piece who nightly uses his influence to stoke the fires of division, with the subtlety and nuance of a sloppy wet fart. But behind those pearly…
2016 Presidential Bumper Stickers For The Rest Of Us.
PLEASE – JUST HOLD THE ELECTION NOW AND GET IT OVER WITH! I CAN’T TAKE IT ANY MORE! – Did anyone else notice that we ultimately are allowed only two choices? – I turned on the TV and thought it…
You Heard it Here First: Clinton Finally Admits Lying
In a gently-conducted interview (surprisingly gentle!) on his home turf of MSNBC, Bill Clinton has actually admitted telling a lie. Huh? Ya what? Yes, this is pretty much unprecedented in American history. See the following astonishing words from Clinton: I…
Obama: “ISIS Must Train Our Kids to Use Guns Responsibly”
President Obama is concerned at the harsh stigma attached to militants of the Islamic State. So he has some wise words for the more narrow-minded citizens, who take a merely partisan approach towards the Islamic State… Now let me say…
Khomeinisexuality: Meet Iran’s Radical Love-Cleric (Part 2/69: Jizz be Upon Me)
Tribute Encore une fois: this one’s for Charlie Hebdo. Nous sommes tous Charlie. Ok, last time you heard from the people men of wisdom; to wit, the only people who really understand enlightened fucking erudite fiqh rulings from the inside…