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	<title>GlossyNews.com &#187; Science</title>
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		<title>An Up Close Look at Australian Animals From Hell</title>
		<link>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/science/201112282019/an-up-close-look-at-australian-animals-from-hell/</link>
		<comments>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/science/201112282019/an-up-close-look-at-australian-animals-from-hell/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 28 Dec 2011 22:49:23 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>rfreed</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Science]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[abominable snowman]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Australia]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[creatures]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Hell]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[kangaroos]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[wallaby]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://glossynews.com/?p=24118</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[No, I am not going to write about kangaroos. I am not that cheap. Everybody who wants to write funny stories about Australia writes about kangaroos. I refuse to stoop that low. They are too easy a target, too cheap a shot. I will, however, write about koala bears. I may not be cheap, but [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/science/201112282019/an-up-close-look-at-australian-animals-from-hell/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>8</slash:comments>
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		<item>
		<title>Mathematician Accused of Using Imaginary Numbers in Global Warming Report</title>
		<link>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/science/201109170702/mathematician-accused-of-using-imaginary-numbers-in-global-warming-report/</link>
		<comments>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/science/201109170702/mathematician-accused-of-using-imaginary-numbers-in-global-warming-report/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 17 Sep 2011 09:32:42 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Leon Hostetler</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Science]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Al Gore]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[climate change]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[congress]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[global warming]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[imaginary numbers]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mathematician]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[warming oceans]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://glossynews.com/?p=18951</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[After a three-week investigation, the Congressional Investigation Committee has unanimously concluded that Kansas mathematician Dr. Bernard Dietrich did intentionally and maliciously use imaginary numbers in the equations used to generate the data in the report he issued a month ago on global warming. As the head of a team assigned by Congress, Dr. Dietrich managed [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/science/201109170702/mathematician-accused-of-using-imaginary-numbers-in-global-warming-report/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>2</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Amateur Astronomer finds Hell in Space</title>
		<link>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/science/201109010547/amateur-astronomer-finds-hell-in-space/</link>
		<comments>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/science/201109010547/amateur-astronomer-finds-hell-in-space/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 01 Sep 2011 08:17:04 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Leon Hostetler</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Science]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[astronomy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Carl Sagan]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[george bush]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Hell]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[NASA]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[satan]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[telescope]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[universe]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://glossynews.com/?p=18945</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[It started out as a normal night for amateur astronomer Rick Saty last Wednesday evening. After setting up his 14-inch reflector telescope in his backyard and collimating it (a process in which the lenses are adjusted to bring them all into perfect alignment), he turned his telescope at a variety of objects in the night [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/science/201109010547/amateur-astronomer-finds-hell-in-space/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Discovery Of Male &#8216;Penis Brain&#8217; Excites Researchers</title>
		<link>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/science/201108270718/discovery-of-male-penis-brain-excites-researchers/</link>
		<comments>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/science/201108270718/discovery-of-male-penis-brain-excites-researchers/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 27 Aug 2011 09:48:59 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>rfreed</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Science]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[brain]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[dinosaurs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[flap/willy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[male member]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[penis]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[thinking with penis]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://glossynews.com/?p=18914</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Physiological scientists have made an amazing discovery in that man (and we mean specifically &#8216;man&#8217; here, not &#8216;wo-man&#8217;) much like the dinosaurs of ancient times, possess a second brain located in an extremity of the body. Both man and dinosaurs have the similarity of having a major brain in their heads that regulates most of [...]]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Ancient Greek High School Unearthed</title>
		<link>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/science/201106050435/ancient-greek-high-school-unearthed/</link>
		<comments>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/science/201106050435/ancient-greek-high-school-unearthed/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 05 Jun 2011 08:05:19 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Will Johnson</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Science]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[archaeology]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Athens]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[excavation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Greece]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[greek]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[high school]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sparta]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://glossynews.com/?p=16203</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Athens, Greece &#8211; GlossyNews.com &#8211; Archaeologists digging in the Greek Peloponnese in the region of ancient Sparta have reported the amazing discovery of a virtually intact Spartan high school once attended by at least 100 students. The Spartans were the ancient Greeks known for their warlike society and, well, spartan lifestyle as depicted in the [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/science/201106050435/ancient-greek-high-school-unearthed/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Scientists Discover Rare Pygmy Bigfoots</title>
		<link>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/environment/201105250616/scientists-discover-rare-pygmy-bigfoots/</link>
		<comments>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/environment/201105250616/scientists-discover-rare-pygmy-bigfoots/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 25 May 2011 09:46:40 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Will Johnson</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Environment]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Science]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[abominable snowman]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[bigfoot]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[midget giant]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[myth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mythical beast]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[pygmy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sasquatch]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[urban legend]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://glossynews.com/?p=16189</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Vancouver, BC &#8211; GlossyNews.com &#8211; In what may finally put to rest the perennial “Does Bigfoot exist?” controversy, a team of Canadian scientists from Saskatchewan State College announced Tuesday that it has discovered a race of pygmy Bigfoots living deep in the remote pine forest of British Columbia. “We tracked a trail of their massive [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/environment/201105250616/scientists-discover-rare-pygmy-bigfoots/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Drug-Induced Lobotomy Offers Hope for Stress-Plagued Society</title>
		<link>http://glossynews.com/society/health/201105110421/new-hope-for-a-stress-plagued-farve/</link>
		<comments>http://glossynews.com/society/health/201105110421/new-hope-for-a-stress-plagued-farve/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 11 May 2011 07:51:27 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Alex Leeman</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Health]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Science]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[doctor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[medication]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mental]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[obama]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[psychology]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Stress]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[suicide]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://glossynews.com/?p=17023</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Stress is the number one mental problem plaguing society today. Stress can lead to obesity, anorexia, suicide, and color T.V. Did you know that there has been a 20% increase of stress-related spontaneous combustion in April 2011 due only to rumors of Whoopi Goldberg leaving The View? It gets worse. More and more people are [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://glossynews.com/society/health/201105110421/new-hope-for-a-stress-plagued-farve/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Aliens Abduct Rhode Island, Connecticut Unaware</title>
		<link>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/science/201104200505/aliens-abduct-rhode-island-connecticut-unaware/</link>
		<comments>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/science/201104200505/aliens-abduct-rhode-island-connecticut-unaware/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 20 Apr 2011 08:35:36 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Will Johnson</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Science]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Strange People]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[alien abduction]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[aliens]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[area 51]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Connecticut]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[little green men]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Martians]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Massachusetts]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Rhode Island]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://glossynews.com/?p=16155</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Woonsocket, RI &#8211; GlossyNews.com &#8211; In one of the most bizarre UFO events yet recorded, aliens reportedly abducted the entire State of Rhode Island. It happened at 3:15 AM May 10. The entire episode was documented by Barney J. Brothers using his cell phone camera and his video has been posted to YouTube, prompting a [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/science/201104200505/aliens-abduct-rhode-island-connecticut-unaware/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>5</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Dung Becomes Newest Clean Energy</title>
		<link>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/environment/201103240359/dung-becomes-newest-clean-energy/</link>
		<comments>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/environment/201103240359/dung-becomes-newest-clean-energy/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 24 Mar 2011 07:29:31 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Kilroy</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Environment]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Science]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Clean Energy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[delicious crop]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[dirty energy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Fibrominn]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Renewable Energy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[tureky waste]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Turkey Poop]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://glossynews.com/?p=15855</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Fibrominn, LLC in Benson, Minnesota has the distinction of being the first U.S. power plant fired by turkey droppings in an effort wean the U.S. from fossil fuel to fecal fuel. And the turkeys couldn’t be happier. The plant burns 90 percent turkey dung and in an ironic twist, creates “clean” power from &#8220;filthy nasty&#8221; [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/environment/201103240359/dung-becomes-newest-clean-energy/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Painting of Big Mac Found in Neanderthal Cave</title>
		<link>http://glossynews.com/society/health/201103211109/painting-of-big-mac-found-in-neanderthal-cave/</link>
		<comments>http://glossynews.com/society/health/201103211109/painting-of-big-mac-found-in-neanderthal-cave/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 21 Mar 2011 14:39:45 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Will Johnson</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Health]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Science]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[archaeology]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Big Mac]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Big n' Tasty]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[cave]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[fast food]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[McDonalds]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Neanderthal]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://glossynews.com/?p=16115</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Saint Sozy, France &#8211; GlossyNews.com French paleontologists have discovered a Neanderthal cave painting said to represent hands eagerly reaching for a Big Mac, or at least proto-Big Mac, according to the journal, Ancient Discoveries. According to Jean-Claude Bouisquet, curator of the Museum of French Archeology, the painting was found during excavation of a Neanderthal cave [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://glossynews.com/society/health/201103211109/painting-of-big-mac-found-in-neanderthal-cave/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>NASA Claims Solar Flare Mistaken for Distress Signal</title>
		<link>http://glossynews.com/top-stories/201103010620/nasa-claims-solar-flare-mistaken-for-distress-signal/</link>
		<comments>http://glossynews.com/top-stories/201103010620/nasa-claims-solar-flare-mistaken-for-distress-signal/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 01 Mar 2011 09:50:53 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Liberties-Taken</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Science]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Top Stories]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[aliens]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[NASA]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[obama]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[solar flares]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[spaceship]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sun]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://glossynews.com/?p=15698</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[A visibly distraught NASA Director Sharon Love spoke to reporters this week about what she called ‘that stupid thing with space aliens.’ “Look, I seriously don’t have time for this. My assignment is outreach to the Muslim world, period. When the boss hears I’ve been doing ‘space crap’ it’s not going to be pretty. He’s [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://glossynews.com/top-stories/201103010620/nasa-claims-solar-flare-mistaken-for-distress-signal/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>2</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Komodo Dragon Genome Escapes from Computer Lab</title>
		<link>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/science/201102141331/komodo-dragon-genome-escapes-from-computer-lab/</link>
		<comments>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/science/201102141331/komodo-dragon-genome-escapes-from-computer-lab/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 14 Feb 2011 17:01:55 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Will Johnson</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Science]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[computer security]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[computer virus]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[kimodo dragon]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[lizard]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[news satire]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://glossynews.com/?p=15596</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Austin, Tex. &#8212; An entire Komodo Dragon genome has reportedly got loose from a MySQL database at Infinite Loop Biological Research Co. in Austin, Tex. and is already starting to breed and reproduce itself in computers and computer networks worldwide. The nightmare of a giant lizard taking up residence inside your computer is fast becoming [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/science/201102141331/komodo-dragon-genome-escapes-from-computer-lab/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>3</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>New Species of Lunatic Discovered</title>
		<link>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/science/201101150207/new-species-of-lunatic-discovered/</link>
		<comments>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/science/201101150207/new-species-of-lunatic-discovered/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 15 Jan 2011 05:37:49 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Liberties-Taken</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Science]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[blame america first]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[crazy person]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[genetics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[new discovery]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[new species]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[psycho]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://glossynews.com/?p=15147</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Psycho-zoology has long been considered a low-glamour science. While botanists and biologists regularly grab headlines with new discoveries, psycho-zoologists labor in obscurity. Experts have always believed there aren’t any new ‘burnt cookie’ species to be identified, due to the thorough research of Sigmund Freud. That long cherished paradigm has now been overturned. Professor Percy Hyde-Warf [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/science/201101150207/new-species-of-lunatic-discovered/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Poodles Dropping Like Flies in France</title>
		<link>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/science/201101141320/poodles-dropping-like-flies-in-france/</link>
		<comments>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/science/201101141320/poodles-dropping-like-flies-in-france/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 14 Jan 2011 16:50:16 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>P. Beckert</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Science]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[bible]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[dogs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[end of days]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[end times]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mass extinction]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[poodles]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[revelation]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://glossynews.com/?p=15094</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[First it was fishes, then it was birds, now it’s poodles. Thousands of standard poodles are dropping like flies in France. While miniature, tea cup, toy and other varieties of poodles seem to be thriving in France and other parts of the world, the standard or authentic “French” poodle seems to be a dying breed. [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/science/201101141320/poodles-dropping-like-flies-in-france/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Sarah Palin&#8217;s Mojo Explained by Voodoo Research</title>
		<link>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/science/201012100251/sarah-palins-mojo-explained-by-voodoo-research/</link>
		<comments>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/science/201012100251/sarah-palins-mojo-explained-by-voodoo-research/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 10 Dec 2010 06:21:55 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Kilroy</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Politics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Science]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Aura of legitimacy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Dr. Gunter Chang]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[palin]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[refudiate]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[research]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sarah palin]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[staunch conservatism]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[StrangleCorp]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://glossynews.com/?p=14056</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Scientists researching the phenomena of Politically Incorrect Mass Propaganda Syndrome (PIMPS) announced a breakthrough into the biggest question of 2010: “What makes Sarah Palin perpetually politically relevant?” After statistically modeling data from thousands of successful people, researchers contend that the three most predictive variables in determining the unprecedented success of Sarah Palin (as well as [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://glossynews.com/science-and-technology/science/201012100251/sarah-palins-mojo-explained-by-voodoo-research/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>5</slash:comments>
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