Month: August 2014
College Senior More Concerned With Zombie Apocalypse Than Future
University if Missouri, Columbia — Despite his mounting college debt and lack of employment, college senior Brent Hamilton appears to be more troubled by the prospect of a zombie apocalypse than his imminent future. “Brent’s always been a little eccentric,…
Pelosi Gets Tough on Pope Francis Regime
It seems not everybody is charmed by controversial cleric Pope Francis. Indeed, one prominent US politician, Nancy Pelosi, is planning very stern measures to punish what she considers to be the brutal and savage policies and order of governance of…
Sex Ed Declared Gross and Bad
Oakland, Indiana — Sexual Education is a course dealing with human sexuality, including anatomy, reproduction, health, and reproductive rights and responsibilities. The topic of whether or not sexual education should be instructed in public schools is still highly controversial and…
Cat Owners Have Hissy Fit Over New Ice Bucket Challenge
A new twist on the popular Facebook Ice Bucket Challenge, which raises money for Lou Gehrig’s Disease, has animal rights activists up in arms, legs and paws alike. The trend, which started amongst celebrities and athletes and spread to Facebook,…
Amidst Crisis in Gaza, Fox Announces New Reality Series ‘Going Gazan’
In a move sure to invite controversy, Fox Television executive Brandon Webber yesterday announced the network has just completed shooting a pilot for a planned reality series set on the border between Israel and the Gaza Strip. ‘Going Gazan,’ which…
Sex Crazed Teens “Syruping” Leads to Genital Ants
One invariable about teens is that, whether raised in the abstinence-only belt of high teen birth rates, or normal states, kids be getting down and dirty. This latest crazy craze involves young girls, often those from the flag team, dousing…
Man Ordering Drink With Meal Undoubtedly Reincarnation Of Gluttonous Roman Emperor
BETHESDA, MD—In an obscene display of wanton excess, local restaurant patron Don Mayhew stunned onlookers as he openly indulged himself in the extravagance of a soft drink along with his meal, disdainfully eschewing the common man’s glass of ice water….
‘What Dreams Shall Come’ – A Spoof Tribute To Robin Williams
Suicides where always a pain for Detective Malny. Always ugly. Always depressing, although he never let that show. This one especially. Robin Williams. One of the most famous comics ever. The guy who always made people laugh. Found hanging by…
The Price That Makes A Joke Of All Life
Just how much is to be expected out of a human in this so-called great United States of America of ours? My mother worked hard all her life, either raising four children in a rat-assed Midwest dying industrial town or…
Obama Blocks Republicans’ Salaries – Saudis Step In
Obama has issued an executive order to block salaries to Republican Congressmen. They responded by saying “They would impeach his black ass”. Democratic Congressmen have hailed this as the best step Obama has taken so far. This said, Republican Congressmen…