Month: June 2011
Meghan Duam is Smrt
In a recent column in the LA Times, writer Meghan Daum explained to America that anytime President Obama stumbles over his words, it’s because of an “intellectual stammer.” Needless to say, doctors were amazed that they had missed this diagnosis…
Bloomberg and the Gay Vote Sitting in a Tree
New York City Mayor Bloomberg made God-fearing GOP senators quake in their extremely heterosexual boots this week when he came out in favor of gay marriage and said he would do everything he can to support a bill brought before…
Yes, Chinese People Really Do Eat Dogs and Cats
I have got to stop eating out at these back alley streets here in China. It’s summer; and it’s hot: and all the foods here in China are rotten! Did you know that Chinese people eat dogs too? Yeah, they…
Sarah Palin Flirts with Rare “Fire in Belly” Bug
FOX NEWS, NEW YORK CITY — GlossyNews.com Former governor of Alaska, Sarah Palin, admitted to Greta van Susternen on her FoxNews show that she is suffering from the rare GOPTea political virus called “fire in belly”, or in beltway-speak: FIB.
Ancient Greek High School Unearthed
Athens, Greece – GlossyNews.com – Archaeologists digging in the Greek Peloponnese in the region of ancient Sparta have reported the amazing discovery of a virtually intact Spartan high school once attended by at least 100 students. The Spartans were the…
Terrorized by Multiple Wives? You Might be a bin Laden
Terrorizing innocent, decent people isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. You get stuck sleeping with cretins who stink like deep-fried weasel, constantly eat curry-laced leftovers, and notice, too late, some jerk used all the toilet paper — no wonder…
Matzo Ball Drowns In Its Own Soup
BROOKLYN, NY—Police found the remains of a 9-day-old Matzo ball in a Park Slope apartment building after neighbors complained about a strong odor coming from 40J. “It was the undeniable smell of chicken broth and parsley,” describes a downstairs neighbor,…
Sony Blames Harold Camping for Prolonged PSN Outage
The weeks of the Playstation Network being down was frustrating for many gamers. What was even more frustrating was the constant reassurance that the network would be back up soon, with that date being pushed farther and farther back. Many…
Tea Party Rejects Alligator Moat Concession
Posted by your South America correspondents Maria and Consuela Lopez – GlossyNews.com In his first major speech on immigration reform, President Obama proved in El Paso he has now learned how to piss off everybody at the same time. We…