Month: December 2009
Fox News Group Leads in Dumbing Down America
Results of a preliminary study conducted by the Institute for the Dumbing Down of America (IDDA), Fox News Group has come out way ahead of any other television network news provider as having phenomenal success in creating misinformed, less intelligent…
Non-Famous Person Dies
Actor Blaine Thornton passed away this week at his home in San Diego, California. He was 91. Mr. Thornton will long be remembered as one of the major stars in early television, but only by his immediate family. A child…
Scientists Would Store Radioactive Waste In Your Yard
Cambridge MA (GlossyNews) — Scientists in a leading institute of technology announced this week that they are making headway into a bold new way to store radioactive waste. Stepping back from creating huge ‘landfills’ of radioactive waste, two scientists are…
City Sued For Providing Free Drugs To Residents
Philadelphia, PA – Recently the Associated Press disclosed that the Environmental Protection Agency plans on collecting 1 million pills during an Earth Day initiative aimed at the people who live around the Great Lakes. They also stated that there is…
Senate Hands Control of Health Care Reform to Private Citizen
Hoboken NJ — In an effort to provide the best possible universal health care coverage to American Citizens, the Senate today released a new, surprise, Health Care Plan where all coverage will be provided through the ‘Bill Whiddel Insurance Agency’….
Woods Chasing Beck in Lost Sponsor Race
FOXNEWDS Studios–NYC. — In a little noticed scenario in the celeb sweeps the recent Tiger girls-rush-to-claim-sex-with-me-first media circus has caused another celeb, Glenn Beck, to amp up his offensive abilities. Beck is reported as hiring a brace of new writers…
White House Crashers, the Salahis, Claim Responsibility for Crashing Twitter
A call from a man claiming responsibility for the recent Twitter hacking, which was originally reported to have been orchestrated by a group calling itself the Iranian Cyber Army, has now been traced to a bungalow in a Washington, D.C….
IKEA To Accept Souls As Currency
In a bold attempt to increase sales, Swedish furniture retailer IKEA has announced that it will soon allow customers to sign away their mortal souls in exchange for store credit. Those whose souls are not wholesome enough to afford more…
Senate Democrats Should be Sent to Reform School
In the wake of the systematic butchering of the Senate version of the health care reform bill almost single-handedly by Sen. Joe Lieberman (Dem/Ind/Rep/Lib-CN), it has been suggested that not only Lieberman, but all Democrats should be sent to Reform…
Aliens Walk Among Us (in Bulgaria Anyway)
Aliens from the Planet Nibiru and also the Pliedes, Lyra and Draco star systems have been visiting Earth for Millenniums what horologists term ‘a very long time’ – according to Bulgarian scientist Prof. Gregor von Numpty – and what is…